Google changes its UI; The end of times have come

At somewhere between 1 and 5 in the morning Eastern standard time, Google updated its user interface. What was before a clean, easy-to-read format for returning relevant search results has taken a completely different turn: a clean, easy-to-read format for returning relevant search results!

Pictured: the decline of Western Civilization.

Immediately, people became furious, filling the twittersphere with their boiling, white-hot fury:

I'm getting the new google results design and... I don't think I have a reason to hate it but it's really unnerving somehow.
— Raskable Glaud (@squidlarkin) March 10, 2014

Unnerving. A word which certainly underestimates the sheer severity of such a change. The shock was so great that @squidlarkin became so severely angered that the only word he could find to express his palpable, volcanic rage with the word unnerving. I feel for you, Squidlarkin.

"You're not crazy," Estes Park News confirmed of my sanity earlier today in their article on the interface change. "The new design removes underlines, increases the font size and, most important, changes the way ads are labeled in search results." Specifically, pay-per-click ads are no longer shaded yellow; they now have a small box labeled "ad" next to them, a change which is estimated to cost businesses a total of 45 trillion dollars by the end of the day.

The horror.

Around the world, the users of the internet felt the drastic change hit them like a rampaging elephant covered in butter. Horse News correspondent Capper General remarked: "Wait, there was a UI update?"